Become Resolute (WT498)

Become Resolute (WT498)

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by Shirley Dalton | 10 Jan, 2020 | Blog, Mindset

WT498 Become resolute

It’s the start of a new year.

Do you make new year’s resolutions?

I gave up on them years ago because I found myself disappointed at the start of the next year when I reflected back and observed that I hadn’t achieved my new year’s resolutions.

But that all changed a few days ago when I discovered the way David Bayer looks at setting new year’s resolutions. 

If we look at the language, we are looking to “resolve” the year that passed; to become resolute about the coming year. 

Here’s the exciting part. What we know from David’s teachings is that the brain is a goal achieving machine, however, it is going to find and stack the evidence for whatever decisions we’ve made about life.   

The key word here is “about”.  It’s the beliefs or decisions we’ve made about ourselves and our lives that determine our decisions “to do”. 

Instead of making new year’s resolutions about things to do, let’s look at making decisions about. For example, “This year I resolve to love myself more and release myself from the fear of financial insecurity.” 

If I work on that, my chances of achieving goals like releasing 10kg and becoming engaged as one of David’s Coaches will happen because I will be changing my limiting beliefs and hacking my brain. 

It’s our limiting beliefs that sabotage us and when you understand this, it’s easy, with the tools we have, to create new beliefs and achieve what you want in life. 

So, what will 2020 be like for you. Will you become resolute? Will you do the work to change your Limiting Beliefs and focus on the decisions you’ve made ABOUT life instead of decisions TO DO?

Don’t Dim to Fit In (WT496)

Don’t Dim to Fit In (WT496)

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by Shirley Dalton | 27 Dec, 2019 | Blog, Mindset

WT496 Don't Dim to fit in

Merry Christmas (if you celebrate it), and Happy Holidays if you don’t.

One of my favourite things to do is to read and on Christmas Day I almost devoured this book “Light is the New Black – A Guide to Answering Your Soul’s Calling and Working Your Light” by Rebecca Campbell (2015).  Ross gave it to me and I love the fact that in the book she writes how whomever is reading this book, whether they bought it for themselves or found it on a bookshelf or received it as a gift, our higher self called it forth. Thank you Ross. Thank you Universe!

There was a page in the book that I want to share with you. Headed “Don’t Dim To Fit In”, it really resonated with me and I think you might like it as well. 

“Don’t dim your light to accommodate someone else’s smallness. We are all born to shine big and bright. The Universe is expanding and you are part of the Universe, so expanding is part of your nature. 

“If someone makes you want to retract, notice and slowly back away, they are not for you and you are not for them. Or better yet find it within yourself to expand and shine your light anyway. Flowers don’t open and close according to who is walking by. They open and show their beauty regardless.” (p86)

I love the last two sentences.  

On page 140, Campbell also writes, “The world will only acknowledge you to the degree that you acknowledge yourself.” 

Wow! I must have heard something similar to this, hundreds, if not thousands of times before and yet today for some reason, I really heard it. It landed. So, I made a decision. I’m going to be a flower and let my light shine regardless of who is walking by. In other words, for me, letting go of the fear of being rejected, of not fitting in.  Fact is, I never have fit in. I even wrote about this a few weeks ago and here it is again. I’m trusting I am not the only one who needs to hear this message.

So, what will you do with this information? Will you be inspired to come out of the closet and start sharing your gifts or will you read it, nod in agreement and file it away?

I do believe the Universe is ever expanding and it’s our turn to play, too.

The more you shine your light, the more you inspire us to do the same. One simple way to start shining your light is to do more of the things that “light you up”; the things you enjoy. For me, that is writing. I love to write and so I am committing to writing more, just for the sheer fun of it, without any expectation of where it may go, etc.

What lights you up? Will you commit to doing more of that in 2020?

As we head into the new year, I wish you a year of shining lights. Happy New Year! May it be everything you want it to be and more.

Cheers,

Shirley

Change Your Password – Reset Your Brain (WT495)

Change Your Password – Reset Your Brain (WT495)

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by Shirley Dalton | 20 Dec, 2019 | Blog, Mindset

WT495 Change your password - Reset your Brain

Have you been keeping up with the latest breakthroughs in brain science? 

I’m absolutely fascinated with understanding how the brain works. 

In summary, your brain as part of the human being operating system is both a goal achieving machine and a Google search engine. 

Imagine you have a project to complete and you go to the library and ask the Librarian for some help to get some resources for your project. 

If she’s a good librarian she’ll be able to direct you to exactly what you want in really quick time.

Well your brain is like that, only it doesn’t filter the information. It points you in the direction that it thinks you want to go because of your beliefs and your thoughts – which is why it’s critical that you pay attention to your beliefs and thoughts. 

If your brain is sending you to the wrong aisle, it’s because your thinking is off. 

You can rewire your brain.  

You can train it to go to the right aisle. 

How do you do this? 

You neurosculpt. You make a new decision and then keep reminding yourself of the new decision and finding more and more evidence for the new decision so that eventually your brain understands the path you want it to take. (David Bayer) 

Think of it this way. Have you ever changed your password and then found yourself forgetting it for the first few days and having to look it up every time you wanted to access your computer or credit card etc. and then after a few days you started to remember it and didn’t need to look it up until you changed it again? 

Your brain is similar. When you make a new decision, it may take a little effort to look up the password until you remember it and your brain starts to cooperate and go in the direction you want it to.

I don’t know about you, but I find this information fascinating. We can change our brains. We can have what we want. We can be who we want to be. 

You just need to change your password and reset your brain. 

And that’s something I encourage you to do, especially over the festive season when you might have some more time to yourself.

Thank you for being part of my community in 2019. As the year draws to a close, I am grateful to have the opportunity to hang out with you and I wish you and your family and friends and colleagues a wonderful Christmas and New Year. I’ll be here next week as well.

Cheers!

It’s a Set Up (WT492)

It’s a Set Up (WT492)

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by Shirley Dalton | 29 Nov, 2019 | Blog, Mindset

WT492 It's a Set Up

When Ross was employed as a Site Supervisor, one of his team members used to joke that it was a “Set Up”, when things didn’t go according to plan. 

This always amused and impressed me because he was able to make light of the situation. 

In my recent studies to become a certified coach of David Bayer’s Phenomenal Coaching Methodology, he too referred to the concept of being set up.

David’s take on the set up is that it is part of what he calls The 4 Blessings of Failure: 

  1. Education (we learn something from the experience) 
  1. Redirect (life’s infinite intelligence is pointing out that we are off course) 
  1. Reflection (time to look more deeply into ourselves and understand more about who we are) 
  1. The Set Up (all of the above). 

You might be wondering where this is going and why I am sharing it with you, so let’s digress for a bit. 

Steve Jobs is often quoted as saying, “You can’t join the dots going forward” but if you look backwards you can always see how perfectly life has worked out. 

Both of these teachings really hit home to me this week as I realised for the first time on a really deep level that my life (and yours) has been one big complete Set Up.

You know my purpose in life is to inspire, educate and support you to be, do, have and feel what you want. I couldn’t live into that if I was like everyone else. I couldn’t travel the world and learn and share with you if I had had children. I couldn’t learn as much as I have and share it with you if I had maintained the same job or lived in the same place for the past 30 years. I couldn’t be there for you if I had a big family that needed support. 

If I look at my life (and yours too) from a different perspective, I can imagine myself on the other side deciding to come to planet earth to fulfil on my mission. In order to fulfil on this mission I’d have to have certain experiences. Whilst I’m here living the experience I don’t necessarily have the insight and certainly don’t enjoy all of them, however if I (and we) join the dots, we can see how life is always working for us and it is one big giant set up. 

So my objective for this week’s thought is to have you reflect on your life. Join the dots. Look back and see how things have always worked out for you, even when you might not have enjoyed the experience and if you’re not enjoying the experience right now, have faith, that this too is all part of the set up and that you are right where you are meant to be and that this too, shall pass.

Keep Your Head Clean (WT490)

Keep Your Head Clean (WT490)

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by Shirley Dalton | 15 Nov, 2019 | Blog, Mindset

WT490 Keep Your Head Clean

I’m not talking about having a shower or washing your face when I say, “Keep Your Head Clean” but of course, knowing me, you know that.

Here’s an example to explain what I mean: Two people go for a promotion at work. Neither of them succeed. Max gets depressed and angry and full of negative self talk such as “I don’t know what I have to do to get ahead in this company. Why does this always happen to me? How come I never seem to get the promotion?” On the other hand, Wendy feels disappointed, however quickly shrugs it off and asks her supervisor, “What can I do to be promoted? What do you need to see in order for me to be recognised and promoted?”

Which of the two do you think has the best chance of being promoted in the future, Max or Wendy?

I trust you answered Wendy. Why?

It’s because Wendy kept her head clean. She stayed open to possibility and she asked empowering questions. 

Our brain is like a Google search engine. Its job is to find the answer to your questions, so it’s imperative that you ask empowering questions.

If you look at the questions Max asked, “Why does this always happen to me? How come I never seem to get a promotion?” It’s easy to see how his brain will come up with all sorts of reasons why it’s most likely not his fault; the supervisor doesn’t know what she’s doing, this company is hopeless, you have to suck up to the boss to get ahead; you can see where this line of thought will end up.

When you understand how the brain works and you understand that it is just another organ in the body, you can put it to work to find you the answers you need, to help you get what you want BUT you have to keep your head clean. You have to ask empowering questions. You have to notice when your thinking is off and correct it as soon as you notice it.

That is how you keep your head clean and create the life you want.

Strategy Vs Belief (WT487)

Strategy Vs Belief (WT487)

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by Shirley Dalton | 25 Oct, 2019 | Blog, Mindset

WT487 Strategy vs Beliefs

Jordan was recounting a story where he had met with his mentor. 

His mentor had given him some advice about how to resolve a situation. 

As I listened to Jordan I couldn’t help but wonder about the success of the suggested strategy. 

You see, I knew Jordan quite well. 

I knew that he knew that the mentor’s advice was correct and that he should take the action as suggested. 

I also knew that Jordan had a few limiting beliefs that were in direct opposition to the advice. 

Here’s an example: Let’s say you want to increase your income by $10,000, $100,000 or $1,000,000. The amount is irrelevant. You learn some sales strategies. You learn how to advertise and market your business or yourself (if you’re employed) and after a while you start to get disappointed because nothing is working. You haven’t increased your income at all. You’ve taken the action as prescribed. You were given the strategy from someone who had successfully implemented it. Why then, didn’t it work for you? 

The reason is because you have a limiting belief (maybe an unconscious belief) that “Money is hard to make” or similar. 

Your beliefs trump any action you take. Your beliefs trump any strategy. 

In this example, if you believe money is hard to make, then money will be hard to make. In other words, you will likely sabotage yourself. You’re setting yourself up for failure before you even begin because you are not aware of the beliefs that are holding you back. 

This is why it so very important for you to discover your limiting beliefs so you can change them and use a technique known as neuro sculpting to rewire your brain so that your beliefs are in alignment with what you want to achieve. 

As for Jordan, the mentor’s advice and strategy were spot on, however they didn’t yield the results Jordan wanted because the real work Jordan needed to do was to discover and change the limiting beliefs. That’s another conversation and not one that everyone is open to. 

Speaking of which, if you would like to know more about discovering your limiting beliefs and why things may not be working out for you, reply to this email and we’ll set up a 15 minute complimentary call.

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