Stop Watching Sucky Movies (WT704)

Stop Watching Sucky Movies (WT704)

Blog

by Shirley Dalton | 22 Dec, 2023 | Blog, Mindset

WT 704 WT 704 Stop watching sucky movies

Today I want to share a story with you that my voice coach, Roger Love shared on our group call, in answer to a question by one of the other “Speakers Guild Members” about being nervous before giving a speech.

Here’s how it goes:

Two workers are standing at the water cooler on a Friday afternoon.

Paul says to Ed, “What’s on for the weekend?”

Ed replies, “I’m going to watch a movie.”

“Great”, says Paul. “Let me know how it goes.”

On Monday, they meet again at the water cooler.

“How was the movie?” asks Paul.

“Not that great”, replies Ed and proceeds to tell him all the reasons why it wasn’t worth watching.

Friday afternoon, they meet again at the water cooler.

Paul asks, “What’s on for the weekend?”

Ed says, “I’m going to watch a movie”.

“Which one?”, asks Paul.

“The same one”, says Ed.

Paul is confused. “You said it was a lousy movie, how come you’re going to watch it again?”

“Oh, I might find something in it”, replied Ed.

“Stop watching sucky movies”, Paul encourages.

And Roger then went on to describe how this is what we do to ourselves when we continue to play our own “sucky movies” of past or future experiences.

Stop watching sucky movies.

Play only the movies from your past or future where you are the hero.

Play only movies that you enjoy and that feel good and that uplift you.

This is especially relevant for us as speakers and trainers, however it applies to everyone.

Prime yourself by watching the movies of your success. Remember the times when you were loved, appreciated or complimented.

Stop watching sucky movies.

And as we fast approach Christmas and the holiday season, remember to make magical memories of all the wonderful things you do and are.

All the best for Christmas 2023. May 2024 be everything you want and more.

P. S. Invite your friends to get the Weekly Thoughts delivered directly to their inbox. Go to https://shirleydalton.com/weekly-thoughts.

P.P.S. EARLY BIRD PROMOTION ENDS TODAY!

Get the Gold package for the price of the Silver package if paid in full by 22nd December, 2023. Save yourself $953.

BRAND NEW 10 Week online Leadership Fundamentals experience starts Tuesday 16th January 2024. Sessions are LIVE and led by myself. There’s absolutely no reason why you can’t find 90 minutes a week to improve yourself and your leadership skills. You don’t have to be in a formal leadership position at work. These skills are life skills. If you’re interested, reply and let me know and we’ll organise a time to chat. Be part of another great team and get the results you want.

Answer The Criteria (WT703) 

Answer The Criteria (WT703) 

Blog

by Shirley Dalton | 15 Dec, 2023 | Blog, Business, Mindset

WT 703 Address the criterior

A while ago I was talking with a client about recruitment. We’ll call him Dave. 

Dave had a need to fill a customer service/administration role in his business. 

I suggested looking for a mum. 

In the past, I’d had great success employing mums who dropped the kids at school, came to work, did an amazing job and then finished in time to pick up the kids. 

The mums benefitted by being able look after their kids and still have some social interaction with adults, make a difference and get paid. 

They were honest, reliable, had a great work ethic and were skilled and experienced. 

As I shared my experience, Dave asked if I would help him recruit for the position. 

Initially, I was a little shocked at his request, however I agreed. 

We advertised. 

The selection criteria included a typing speed of 40 words per minute, 95% accuracy. 

Only one of the applicants addressed the criteria in their application.  

We know that interview is the least reliable form of recruitment so we included a few activities to test typing speed and accuracy, spelling, grammar and mathematical skills. 

We held off some of the interviews because one lady was away at the time we planned to conduct the interviews and her resume indicated that she was a good match for the role so we waited a few weeks. 

I confirmed the night before the interview. 

The next morning, (the day of the interview) she sent an SMS saying that she was no longer available for the position. 

I have to say, this has been an interesting journey. 

The world has changed. 

Forty odd years ago when I applied for my first full-time job, I would have done anything the potential employer asked me.  

I would have made sure that I addressed all the selection criteria. 

I would have made myself available to attend the interview at their convenience, and would have considered myself very lucky, if I made it to an interview. 

For me, not addressing the selection criteria tells me you can’t follow instructions. I might be wrong but remember, you only get one chance to make a good first impression. 

Answer the criteria. 

So what’s this got to do with you? 

If you’ve got good staff, hang on to them. 

If you’re applying for a position, if you answer the criteria, you’ll go to the top of the list.  

Recruitment and staff management have changed over the last few years, especially since Covid. More and more people are assessing what they want to do for work and how they want to live their lives. 

As employers, we need to accept the changes and adapt so that our businesses can thrive with less people and better systems, including much more automation. 

I’m curious to hear your experience? What’s happening in your industry? 

Have you got certain criteria that you need applicants to meet or can you adjust to accommodate the changes? 

P. S. Invite your friends to get the Weekly Thoughts delivered directly to their inbox. Go to https://shirleydalton.com/weekly-thoughts. 

P.P.S.  BRAND NEW 10 Week online Leadership Fundamentals experience starts Tuesday 15th January 2024. Sessions are LIVE and led by myself. There’s absolutely no reason why you can’t find 90 minutes a week to improve yourself and your leadership skills.  You don’t have to be in a formal leadership position at work. These skills are life skills.  If you’re interested, reply and let me know and we’ll organise a time to chat. Be part of another great team and get the results you want. 

The Magic (WT702)

The Magic (WT702)

Blog

by Shirley Dalton | 8 Dec, 2023 | Blog, Leadership, Mindset

WT 702 The Magic

Right now, I wish I had an affiliate link to Amazon or Audible.

I’m recommending you get “The Magic” by Rhonda Byrne.

The book had been sitting in my library for quite some time and I hadn’t gotten around to reading it, until it was recommended by one of my mentors in an online group.

Magically, the group turned into a team, aptly named “Team Magic” and we agreed to work through the book together.

It truly was a magical experience.

Having an online group provided support, encouragement, motivation and accountability.

Each day we would post an image or message showing the task completed for that day.

Yesterday I completed the book and the tasks and I have to say, my mindset and results did magically change.

So, apart from the book recommendation, today’s thought is also about the power of teamwork.

Our virtual team included people in all different states in Australia and also overseas. Being online meant that we could post at any time that was convenient and team members could respond whenever it suited them.

Without the team, I may not have been totally committed.  In fact, I insisted Ross do the activities as well so whilst he wasn’t posting in the What’s App group, he too completed the book.

Magical outcomes occurred. Ross had advertised a motorbike for sale and whilst there had been some initial interest, as soon as the magic kicked in he sold the bike – easily and effortlessly.

There’s a saying, “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.”

Working with a team takes you farther. For many of us, we will do the things we might not feel like doing because we don’t want to let the team down. Of course, this benefits us because we get the thing done.

Working with a team also enables you to learn different things because we all have different perceptions and different values. What you miss, someone else might pick up and share, so you now have double the knowledge.

When you’re learning something new, being part of a team also enables you to practise in a safe environment.

I’ve been so impressed with the experience, I even encouraged one of my clients to start and offered to be her accountability partner.

Why? Because I know, if you do the work, you’ll get the results. If you have an accountability partner, you’ll do the work when you don’t feel like it. If you have an accountability partner you can support each other when needed.

My wish for you is that you find a team to help you achieve what you want to achieve.  It can be for a specific timeframe such as days, weeks or months.  I’ve also been a member of teams that have been meeting for over 10 years.

What is it that you want to achieve? What results do you want?

Are you getting them by yourself and if not, how about inviting others to be part of your team.

Now’s the time to step up and become the leader. Remember, if you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.

P. S. Invite your friends to get the Weekly Thoughts delivered directly to their inbox. Go to https://shirleydalton.com/weekly-thoughts.

I Still Want You To Do It (WT700)

I Still Want You To Do It (WT700)

Blog

by Shirley Dalton | 24 Nov, 2023 | Blog, Leadership, Mindset

WT 700 I still want you to do it

In our Mastermind meeting this week, one of the participants was talking about her experience interviewing potential financial planners to help her. We’ll call her Robyn.

Robyn’s looking at selling her business in a few years and wants to know the best strategy and timing to maximise her return on her investment and minimise the tax to pay.

She shared with me that she had met with three different planners and still could not decide which one to work with.

What we discovered was that they had failed to demonstrate to her that they knew what they were doing and that they could help her.

Robyn expressed that they may not want to tell her the strategy etc. until she has signed up because:

  1. That’s how they make their money
  2. They may think she will get the information and do it herself.

“I don’t want to do it”, she said.  “But I do want to know they can do it.”

This is where case studies and testimonials can be very helpful.

Your potential clients are looking for confidence. They want to know that you have helped others in a similar situation so therefore you might be able to help them.

A picture came into my mind as were talking.

It’d be like interviewing a cleaner to clean your house or office. They can tell you how they’re going to clean, what chemicals they’re going to use, how often they’ll clean certain areas etc. and even though they may have told you the “how”, it doesn’t mean you want to do it.   Giving you their strategy and technique gives you the confidence that they know what they’re doing so you can engage them.

It’s a similar thing with the financial planners.  Robyn doesn’t want the knowledge to be able to go and do it herself. She wants the confidence that they know what they are doing. She wants to feel comfortable that they can advise her on the best strategy and that they have the technical expertise to help her.

Sometimes, as service providers, we can get caught up thinking we can’t share what we know in case others will take the knowledge and use it and therefore not engage us.  This is scarcity thinking. For the most part, your prospective clients don’t want to do the work, they want to engage you, so give them a good reason to.

Give them confidence you can help them. Share what you know that will be most helpful to them and provide examples of how you have helped others in the same situation.

As one of my other clients says, “selling is a transference of confidence”. He or she who has the most confidence gets the business.

Might be time to take a look at your offer and how you present it.

Are you instilling confidence in your prospective clients?

Are you demonstrating to them that you have the knowledge, skills and expertise to help them?

P.S. Our next Leading Yourself and Leading Others Experience and Loyal Lieutenant Masterclass Series will both start in February 2024. Early bird discounts apply, so keep an eye out for more information to come.

P.P.S. Invite your friends to get the Weekly Thoughts delivered directly to their inbox. Go to https://shirleydalton.com/weekly-thoughts.

What Story Are You Making Up? (WT699)

What Story Are You Making Up? (WT699)

Blog

by Shirley Dalton | 17 Nov, 2023 | Blog, Mindset

WT 699 What story are you making up

As humans, we need to make sense of our world and what happens to us.

In order to close the loops in our minds we tend to make up stories to explain what’s happening to us.

Let me give you an example:

Ross and went to the gym and later, over coffee, Ross asked me how I felt on a particular machine at the gym that morning.

“Ok”, I said. “Why do you ask?”

“You know the settings were different on each side of the machine?” he sort of asked but really told me.

“Oh. I just thought my left arm was weaker than my right.”

He laughed. “No, the settings were completely different, which caused one arm to work harder than the other.”

One thing led to another and we found ourselves discussing how much we make up in our own minds to explain events.

The conversation then moved to the work by Michael A. Singer from his book “The Untethered Soul” where Michael explains how our minds work and how it is futile to fight with our mind.

Essentially, we are asking our minds to make us feel okay; to make it so that everyone likes us and so the mind has to think about this constantly. It argues with itself and according to Singer, “If you fight with your mind, you lose.”

You might try suppressing the thoughts, but that only works for a little while and eventually the thoughts surface and come back at you at a later time.

The way to resolve the issue is to observe your mind. Become the one who watches. When you observe you can see that your mind is working overtime to make everything ok.

The trick is to gently disengage from it. Separate yourself from your thinking mind, because it is not you. You are the one who watches the mind.

You won’t quiet the mind, so don’t try. Rather, don’t listen. Relax and simply observe.

Your mission this week is to observe the stories your mind is making up.

Observe the fights that occur in your mind and simply let go.

Let me know how you go.

P.S. Our next Leading Yourself and Leading Others Experience and Loyal Lieutenant Masterclass Series will both start in February 2024. Early bird discounts apply, so keep an eye out for more information to come.

P.P.S. Invite your friends to get the Weekly Thoughts delivered directly to their inbox. Go to https://shirleydalton.com/weekly-thoughts.

How Do You Feel? (WT698)

How Do You Feel? (WT698)

Blog

by Shirley Dalton | 10 Nov, 2023 | Blog, Mindset

WT 698 How do you feel

How did you wake up today?

How do you feel?

Thinking I was being funny, when a yoga teacher asked me one time, (very early in the morning), how I felt, I answered that “I didn’t know yet”. I now realise the folly of this type of comment. It’s not funny.

I can’t remember which book or program I’ve been working on lately, (I often have multiple going at the same time) but one of them gave me a real wake up call about my language when I start the day.

 According to the teachings, most of us depend on external cues to decide how the day is going to go for us.

Ouch!

As an example, say you get on the scales. Depending on the number you are looking at, you may feel happy, sad, angry or indifferent.

Your emotions are being dictated by external factors.

Instead, how about we decide how we’re going to feel when we wake up and how the day will go from there.

Ross and I have just completed Louise Hay’s 21 Day Mirror Work Challenge. The objective is to get ourselves to love ourselves more; to be less critical and judgemental because if we criticise ourselves, we’re more likely to be criticising and judging others.

When we criticise and judge others, we’re not happy and grateful and when we’re not happy and grateful, we attract shitty things into our lives.

So, in this short but very very powerful thought this week, I want to you to start to notice a couple of things:

  1. Are you choosing internal or external factors to determine how your day goes?
  2. Are you being kind to yourself and loving yourself when you look in the mirror or are you criticising and judging yourself?
  3. Are you choosing to be grateful for what you have and what you expect to come or are you pushing it away by being critical and judgemental?

That’s it.  A week of awareness and if you find you’re on the critical and ungrateful side, simply be aware and change your thoughts and focus.  This will change your feelings and your feelings and thoughts together will change what you experience.

P.S. Invite your friends to get the Weekly Thoughts delivered directly to their inbox. Go to https://shirleydalton.com/weekly-thoughts.

Pin It on Pinterest