This week I wanted to scream.

I’d been talking with some business owners about the next Leading Yourself and Leading Others experience, coming up in February 2026.

“They’re not ready”, they kept telling me, referring to their team members.

I was so frustrated because I’ve seen the transformation in people who were “not ready” and who absolutely did not want to do the leadership training and yet they did.

The frustration comes from knowing what is possible for people and not being able to help them see it.

I’m guilty of it myself. Years ago, my mother and father arrived one weekend with a mysterious box which turned out to be a barbeque. 

“We don’t need a barbeque”, we thought.

How wrong we were. We ended up using that barbeque about 4 nights a week.

It was a classic example of you don’t know what you don’t know.

Having invested in personal and professional development all my life, I just don’t understand why people don’t rush to take advantage of what is being offered to them, especially when it can make such a positive difference in their lives.

Still, you can’t force people to do something if they don’t want to do it.

So, I will console myself with one of the topics we teach in the Leadership experience: The Cycle of Change by Prochaska & Di Clemente (who originally devised it in the health industry to understand the process to help smokers quit smoking).

The cycle goes like this:

1. Pre-contemplation (not ready, not aware, not even thinking about it or in denial)
2. Contemplation (aware that change might be beneficial, starting to think about it)
3. Preparation (getting ready to take action, planning)
4. Action (making the decision, taking some steps toward change)
5. Maintenance (keeping on with the new behaviours, thoughts or attitudes)
6. Relapse – what most of us suffer from at one time or another. Start again.
7. Transcendence – having changed, it would feel strange to “go back to the old ways”. Change is most likely permanent.

If you’re in business you too can apply this to your customer decision making process as well as your team.

Are they ready or are they getting ready?

And if they are getting ready, DON’T GIVE UP ON THEM.

As frustrating as it can be, one day “They’re Not Ready” will turn into “They’re Ready” and then the change can begin.

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Today’s thought might be a bit confronting as we ask and answer what I think is a deep question.

This week I had scheduled to run 3 x 2 hour presentations, “How to Succeed as a Solopreneur”.

On Sunday afternoon I lost it.

I’d spent practically all weekend preparing and practising.

In tears, I cried to Ross, “How come I can’t be like everybody else?”

“Why can’t I be happy to just work for someone and have weekends and evenings off, like other normal people? How come I always seem to be working on the weekend? Why do I put so much pressure on myself?”

Of course Ross knew too well to even attempt to answer that question because he knew it wasn’t a real question.

It was my way of expressing my fear that the presentations may not be whatever I deemed to be “successful”.

During the week I shared this story with a colleague and added, “I’m unemployable” to which she replied, “No you’re not, you’ve got so many skills and so much to offer”.

I corrected my communication, “I mean my attitude.”

And here is the confronting part, there is no such thing as “normal”.

We are all individuals. 

We all have unique gifts and talents that we bring to the world.

At times we can be challenged to show up, however I want to encourage you to stay true to who you are and to not compare yourself with anyone else or look to the other side of the fence, thinking the grass is greener.

Whether you’re an employee or an employer or a solopreneur or a stay at home mum or dad or carer, whatever you choose is OK as long as you are choosing it.

After I got over my little tanty, I settled down and focussed on being grateful.

I am grateful that I have the freedom to choose to work on weekends. 

I am grateful that I have the freedom to choose what I want to work on and with whom.

How about you?

If you find yourself asking, “Why can’t I …..?” how about reframing your question to “How lucky am I, I get to ….?

When we understand that everything in life is a choice, we take back our power.

If you find yourself having a tanty and saying things you don’t really mean, look to what’s underneath that.  Ask yourself “What’s going on here?  What’s the real issue?”

I’ll wager that it’s not the thing you’re complaining about.

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This week I put my hand up to get some feedback on one of my roleplay calls from my mentor – in front of the group.

To say I was nervous was an understatement. I had recently resat the training after I had submitted the recording, so I was able to give myself a huge amount of feedback on what I had missed.

At the end of the mentoring session, one of the group members reached out to me privately on What’s App and gave me her feedback. She said “You are fearless”.

I was sharing this story with another colleague and confessed, that’s not how I would describe myself. In fact, in lots of ways, I have a lot of fear.

My colleague responded with, “You continually show up”. I couldn’t argue with that. I do show up and I put my hand up for coaching and feedback continuously.  I don’t always like what I hear, however I do my best to take it on board and improve.

So I started thinking about the clients I have been coaching lately and how we celebrated those who showed up for their coaching and mentoring support call.

It was so inspiring to see the progress they are making towards their goals. They were all beaming with joy and pride as they shared their achievements and the action they are taking.

Life rewards Action! (source: Authentic Education)

They showed up and they continue to show up.

One of the participants commented that he “always likes to show up because it’s a constant reminder of things he might otherwise forget. In other words, it keeps him in action towards his goals”.

The point of this week’s thought is to encourage you to continue show up.

No matter what that looks like for you, if you continue to show up and do the work towards achieving your goals, you are bound to be successful.

And I’m here, in your corner, cheering you on.

Let me know what you’re working on and what showing up means for you.

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