“Everywhere I go, I get bullied”, cried Jane.

“Don’t say that”, I replied. “Because that’s what you’ll manifest.”

Our words are so important.

They are commands to our unconscious minds.

Let’s make a pact that this year, we will be very mindful about the language we use, especially when describing ourselves and our situations.

Bullying doesn’t just occur in the workplace.

It can happen with suppliers as well.

Don’t allow yourself to be bullied into accepting a product or service you don’t want.

You are the expert on you.

You know what you want and don’t want.

It’s okay to say “No”, when you don’t want something.

Here’s an example. George sought some legal and accounting advice. The advice was sound, however the strategy suggested wasn’t what George wanted to do.

“I know what they are saying is right”, said George. “But I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to start legal action. I just want to get on with things and put it down to the cost of my education, albeit a very expensive education.”

“Then don’t”, I agreed.

“Don’t allow yourself to be bullied. Thank them for the advice. You now know what your options are. Pay their bills and do what you want to do. At the end of the day, it is you who has to live with your decision.”

Just because we seek advice (from friends, family, professionals), doesn’t mean we have to implement what they say.

If you’re feeling uneasy about a decision to purchase or do something, question it. Our emotions are guideposts and if it isn’t a “Hell Yes”, then it’s a “Hell No.”

Don’t allow yourself to be bullied into buying or doing something you don’t want to.

It’s okay to say “No thank you.”

Here’s to an awesome 2023. May it be your year to be assertive.

P.S. Invite your friends to get the Weekly Thoughts delivered directly to their inbox. Go to https://shirleydalton.com/weekly-thoughts.

P.P.S. Our next Loyal Lieutenant Masterclass Series starts on Thursday 19^th January 2023. If you want to learn what it means to be a Loyal Lieutenant (Second-In-Command) AND work on streamlining and documenting your operations and procedures, click the link to register now. Last chance to enrol is Monday 16^th January. https://shirleydaltoncourse.com/Webinar

You may be aware of the learning styles according to Neurolinguistic Programming:

1. Visual
2. Auditory
3. Kinaesthetic
4. Audio Digital

These are great to know for yourself and your team to ensure you make the most of your training opportunities.

What I discovered in the past few weeks though, is that there is another layer to our learning styles.

Disclaimer: this is coming from my experience and I have not researched this yet, so let’s call it a discussion.

One of my clients, we’ll call her Abigail, was commenting about how one of her team members did not access the training provided in their resource library.

Abigail kept redirecting the team member to the library and was frustrated because she expected the team member to be an independent learner.

In other words, help yourself to the training, which I might add had been prepared to cater for all learning styles above. There were videos, written instructions, verbal instructions and do it yourself instructions. Audio Digital is more about making lists in your own mind, so of course there were checklists to follow.

“I don’t understand Shirley, how come she won’t sit down and learn by herself. She is constantly interrupting other team members and asking questions, when the answers are there in the procedures”, questioned Abigail.

Hmmm. This reminded me of another conversation I had recently had with another client, we’ll call Joseph. Joseph had wanted he and I to enrol in a training course together.

I mentioned to Joseph that the course was digital and we had to learn at our own pace.

He didn’t like the sound of that.

“I want a facilitator”, he said. “I want to be taught.”

I shared this with Abigail.

“OMG! That’s right”, she said.

“She wants to be taught and I don’t have the time or resources to enable 1:1 training. I need independent learners.”

This got me thinking about my own learning style in terms of whether I prefer to learn on my own or be taught. For me, it doesn’t really matter because I just love learning.

However, I can see that it does make a difference to some.

How about you? How about your team?

Are you an independent learner or do you need to be taught by someone. Do you need a facilitator to interact with?

It’s a great concept to look at in your organisation. Whilst you may have been paying attention to the V.A.K. styles of learning, now might be a good time to go a little deeper and look to whether your team are independent learners or needing a facilitator, and if needing a facilitator, how you might be able to accommodate that.

As I ponder this, it also helps explain to me how much value our Leading Yourself and Leading Others experience is because it is fully facilitated by me, over 4 intensive days, plus follow up 1:1 coaching sessions and a mastermind session.

The online Practical Leadership membership is a different story. There’s over 3 years worth of content there and I notice that some members don’t access the content, yet they show up for the twice monthly group coaching/mastermind calls.

It’s a fascinating topic and something I want to learn more about because my mission is to inspire, educate and support you to be, do, have and feel what you want. To that end, if I’m educating you, it’s to both our benefit to know your learning style.

Something for you to think about over the Christmas New Year period. Wishing you all the very best for the festive season. No breaks here, the Weekly Thoughts will continue.

Merry Christmas.

P.S. EARLY BIRD DISCOUNT for our February 2023 Leading Yourself and Leading Others Experience ends on 31^st December, 2022.  Save yourself up to $1500. If you’re thinking about enrolling, do it before the 31^st December. Click the link for more information https://shirleydalton.com/leading-yourself-leading-others-may2020/

It’s so interesting to me that themes seem to appear over a number of weeks. It’s like the Universe gives us a nudge and says “Pay Attention”.

A couple of weeks ago I was interviewing team members and reviewing systems and processes for a client. A couple of the team members mentioned the importance of taking notes when being trained and when training people.

I agree and I also know that organisations have options for documenting procedures so employees can continue to refer to them.

By documenting, I mean recording the information in a format that suits the business, the workers and the process. It doesn’t always have to be a written procedure. It can be a video or audio recording, a checklist, a diagram or a workflow as examples.

As I lay on the bed this week, listening to the doctor train the nurse in how to administer laser treatment to my face (which felt like someone flicking me in the face numerous times with their fingers), I couldn’t help but share some tips.

The nurse didn’t appear to be taking any notes.

The doctor was sharing complex and detailed information about the settings on the machine and how to apply it to my face.

“Are you familiar with Loom.com?” I asked, doing my best to take my mind off my discomfort.

“No, what’s that they asked.”

“It’s a screen capture program that can be downloaded to your phone and you can video your training and then share the link with people so they can watch it over and over again”, I replied. It would be really helpful for you to be recording your training now so that you and others can refer to it again and again.

They seemed interested, however they didn’t take note of the application. I’m trusting they have a good memory.  

“You need a Gmail account and Chrome browser”, I continued.

“And you can then get it transcribed using Otter.ai.”

“Oh, do you use this in your business?” the doctor asked.

“It is my business”, I answered. “I work with small business owners and their teams to streamline their operations and document their processes as well as provide leadership and communication training.”

Still no notes.

You gotta make notes.

Only about 7% of the population are auditory learners. Sixty five percent are visual and 28% are kinaesthetic (learn by doing).

When I say, “You gotta make notes”, I mean you have to record the information in some format.

Why?

Because it takes the pressure off having to remember everything in the first pass of training. It also enables others to be trained in a consistent manner to a specific standard and it allows you to hold people accountable to following the policy, procedure and standard.

It doesn’t matter what format you choose to use, as long as you document or record your policies and procedures in some way.

As I headed home for a bag of ice for my face, I was troubled, thinking about the number of people who get trained by “show and tell” methods and who don’t take notes (or record it in some way) and how many times the trainers have to train the same information over and over again.

Recording your policies and procedures actually gives you more time because you only have to do it once.

Your task this week is to document/record at least one procedure. Give it a go. Try Loom.com and Otter.ai. You can set up a free account. I trust it will inspire you to keep going.

Next week, I’ll share a funny little story about our assessment for the final session of our 9 week online masterclass series – The Loyal Lieutenant.

Regards Shirley

P.S. Our signature Leading Yourself and Leading Others Experience starts Friday 3^rd February 2023. Early bird discount ends 31^st December 2022. Click on the link for more information. https://shirleydalton.com/leading-yourself-leading-others-may2020/

P.P.S. The Loyal Lieutenant book is now available on Amazon. Click on the link bit.ly/TLLebook