Blog
What’s The Right Thing To Do (WT614)
I was sitting at my desk, which is opposite the window in my office. I noticed a young boy and a dog walk past. Thankfully the dog didn’t stop to you know what. Next thing I heard the lid on the neighbour’s garbage being opened and shut really quickly. That’s odd, I thought. The neighbour was at work. It was about 4:00pm. I didn’t give it any more thought until Ross happened to mention the garbage lid. Ross was outside when the young boy and dog walked past. He watched the young boy lift the lid on the neighbour’s bin (which usually sits outside on the nature strip in front of his...
What I Missed (WT613)
Years ago, like nearly 30, I was employed in various government departments. At the time, one of the buzz words was “community”. I confess, I really didn’t understand what it meant. In fact, it wasn’t until years later that I understood it to mean people knowing each other and looking after and supporting each other (my definition). Last weekend I happened to be walking along the street with a new friend when I bumped into an old friend. Immediately we hugged (ooops, forgot about Covid) and had a chat. It was so nice to see someone familiar; someone with whom I had history. We had both...
We Didn’t Know What We Were Doing (WT612)
One of the concepts we include in our Leading Yourself and Leading Others Experience is “synergy” where 1+1=5. In other words, the whole is greater than the sum of the parts. What this means is that when you have a high performing team you can create magic. You can achieve far more with your team than what you could by adding up individual efforts. Here’s why this is relevant. I am so grateful to Kellie O’Brien and Chrystie Hile who jumped on board to create a team with me to get my book published and launched. I couldn’t have done it without them. None of us really knew what we were doing....
Here’s My Problem (WT611)
This week was an exciting week. I spoke at the conference and launched my new book and I got to use some great skills I learned from another book, “Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It” by Christopher Voss and Tahl Raz. We arrived at our accommodation about 8pm and checked in. We parked the car, took our bags to our room and were immediately disappointed. “This won’t do”, I said to Ross. “Why not?” he asked. “Because, I specifically requested a room with a lounge (sofa)”. Dragging our bags with us, we returned to reception. “I’m sorry. This room is...
Change Me (WT610)
As we wrap up Day 4 of the Leading Yourself and Leading Others experience, one of the main concepts we learn is that of “Change Me – Change You”. What that means is that rather than asking, demanding or expecting the other person to change, we understand that because we are in a relationship with someone, if we want the other to change, we must change first. To demonstrate this, I move from one end of the room to the other. Because the participants and I are in a relationship, they shift in their seast to be able to see and hear me. It’s then that I explain that because I have changed, and...
Why Are You Coming? (WT609)
In a few weeks I’m speaking at The Complete Leader Conference hosted by Realtair and launching my book. I called the hotel to make a reservation. I was intrigued at the response I got. I shared that I wanted a room for 3 nights. “Oh, we only have a room block with a special rate for 2 nights”, said Mary. “That’s okay. Can I stay and pay for 3 nights please? I’m also a member (of the hotel chain).” “Yes, let me see what I can do for you,” she replied. I gave her my details and she offered me a room and a price. It was the basic room with the cheapest price and only included a bed and...
If You Care About The Relationship (WT608)
Day 2 of our Leading Yourself and Leading Others experience. One of the biggest concepts to appreciate when you’re learning to improve your communication skills is this: “If you care about the relationship, use your skills. If you don’t care about the relationship, take the gloves off and have a go.” What does that mean? It means that we have a choice. We are always choosing whether to use our communication skills or not. Why would we care about the relationship? The person you’re in relationship with is important to youThe relationship is important to you and worth fighting forAnother...
I’m Scared (WT607)
Yesterday we completed the first of 4 workshops in our Leading Yourself and Leading Others Experience. Some of the participants expressed to me that they were feeling nervous prior to starting the experience. For me, nervous is also another word for scared. It’s okay to be scared and nervous or anxious when you do new things or open yourself up to new experiences and growth. What matters is that you keep going. Often what happens is that we get to the point of almost breaking through and we give up just before the moment when …. because we feel uncomfortable. It’s helpful to understand the...
Knowledge or Wisdom (WT606)
This week I had a wonderful conversation with a colleague around knowledge vs wisdom. You know my favourite quote in the world is “The great aim of education is not knowledge but action” by Herbert Spencer. Well this week I learned a new term “propositional knowledge”. It’s a concept in psychology. If you have propositional knowledge about a topic, you know the theory and you have an understanding of the proposition that you believe to be true. For example, you can watch someone ride a push bike. You can see that you need to keep your balance centred, your back straight and use your legs to...
Not Every Kid Gets a Trophy (WT605)
When I was growing up I had a friend who was very athletic. She always seemed to get out of school by going to the regional, zone and state athletic carnivals and she would come back with a fistful of medals and trophies. I was very envious. The best I could do was come last in a three-legged race. I wasn’t athletic, but I was smart. I learned that not every kid gets a trophy and this helped me to understand my strengths and weaknesses. This memory came to the fore recently when one of my clients was telling me about some of his team members whom he had to let go. “Shirl, they just couldn’t...