You know how every so often someone says something and it really resonates with you? Well, I was at a new yoga class this morning and the yoga teacher made a comment that I thought I’d share with you.
“We spend a lot of time in our mind each day, so we’d better make sure it’s a nice place to stay.”
Wow. This resonated because of the work I’ve done with David Bayer regarding suffering.
Bayer’s mission is to end all human suffering. What he means by that is our psychological suffering.
There is no suffering in the experience.
If we look to nature, there is no suffering. No psychological suffering. Flowers don’t get upset because one is a brighter red than another. Squirrels don’t get stressed thinking they may not be able to find a nut and birds aren’t worried that they might fly in the wrong direction.
We humans have this unique ability to create suffering in a world where suffering doesn’t naturally exist.
This week my heart has gone out to a number of clients who have been suffering in the primal state of anxiety, anger, resentment and generally feeling lousy because of situations that have occurred.
It’s helpful to remind ourselves that’s there no suffering in the experience. It’s just an experience. The suffering comes from what we think about the experience and the meaning we give it.
Another point Bayer makes is that our emotions are our guideposts from our nervous system and that if the nervous system is in dissonance with our energy, we feel “bad”. He says that if we feel bad, it’s a clue that our thinking is off; that what we are thinking isn’t true.
It took me a long time to understand this concept. How can what I’m thinking not be true? If you play with the concept and accept that what you’re thinking can’t be true, we can ask another question. If this isn’t true, then what is true? Often it’s the exact opposite of what we’re thinking.
If you go deeper into the enquiry and are open to the insights that will be revealed you’ll find that the suffering goes.
As an example, Bayer felt terrible when his cherished dog died. He was thinking that his dog shouldn’t have died. He applied his teachings. “If what I’m thinking isn’t true, then what is true? That my dog should have died?” The answer is “Yes” because the dog did in fact die.
Enter the enquiry. “If he was meant to die at this time, (he was an old dog with serious health issues), then what am I upset about? I’m upset because I won’t see him again.”
A little while later he got the inspiration to check out near death experiences of people, who as it turns out, were met by their pets. Hmmmm. “So I will see my dog again”, explained Bayer and with that the suffering ended.
I accept this might be a bit to get your head around. I encourage you to give it some thought and play with it next time you find yourself in a negative emotional state.
Go into the enquiry of it.
Remember, we spend a lot of time in our mind each day, so make sure it’s a pleasant place to stay.
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P.P.S. There’s still time to register for our February Leading Yourself and Leading Others Experience. Here’s the link for more information. Contact me urgently if you’d like to attend. We only have a few places left. https://shirleydalton.com/leading-yourself-leading-others-may2020/