Stop Pushing Me (WT403)

Stop Pushing Me (WT403)

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WT 403 Stop pushing me

When I started High School, it was “cool” for girls to shave their legs. It was a long time ago before waxing became the norm. 

I asked my mum if I could borrow her razor. 

“What do you want that for?” she asked. 

“To shave my legs of course”, expecting that she should have known that all the cool girls shave their legs. 

“No! You’re not shaving your legs,” she almost screamed at me. 

“Why not? Everybody else is,” I cried. 

“You’re not and that’s all there is to it,” and with that I was dismissed. 

Now being the strong willed, pig headed and rebellious character that I can be, what do you think I did? 

You guessed it. I went into the bathroom and I shaved my legs. 

Not content to just silently call victory to myself, I flaunted the act by going and standing next to my mother who was on her hands and knees cleaning up a spill on the floor. 

I simply stood there until she figured something was up. Without looking up at me, she turned to face my legs, ran her hand up my leg to make sure she wasn’t just seeing things and then slapped my leg so hard that it stung and repeated, “I told you not to shave your legs”. 

Mission accomplished, I grinned and walked off. 

And I’ve been regretting that decision for over 40 years.  

So what has this story got to do with “Stop Pushing Me”? 

For me, it’s about knowing myself and being able to respond rather than react. 

My rebellious streak has gotten me into trouble (a lot). 

If I feel pushed to do something or am told I am not allowed to do something, my rebellious nature will arc up. 

Thankfully, over the years I have come to recognise it and have learned to manage myself with awareness and self talk, although the initial feelings can still be quite strong. 

And why is this the topic for this week’s thought? 

Following on from last week’s thought, “Every team needs a leader”, it’s important for you to know your people and to know when to encourage, push or support. 

It can be tricky to know the difference and timing is everything. The last thing you want to do is push someone when they are at breaking point and needing some care and attention and by the same token, neither do you want to let them off the hook when they do need to step up and take responsibility and do the work. 

You’ll know which way to go if you tune in to your people and listen to what they are telling you, both verbally and non-verbally. 

And now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go shave my legs.

Every Team Needs a Leader (WT402)

Every Team Needs a Leader (WT402)

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WT 402 Every team needs a Leader

One of the things I love about our leadership program is the way the participants really get to experience what it means to be part of a team and how much every team needs a leader. 

Each session the participants are assigned homework. If everyone completes every task, the participants receive a “Pass” overall. 

If just one task is missed, by just one participant, the entire “team” is awarded a “No Pass”. 

In all the time I have been running the programs, there has only been one group that passed one session of the homework.  

This might surprise you and like me you might think, “How hard can it be to do some tasks?” 

The other interesting thing is that almost universally, no-one steps up to lead the group. 

I call them a group of individuals because for the most part, participants operate on an individual basis until they get the concept of “team”. 

It’s really fascinating to observe human psychology and behaviour.  

All it would take for the team to Pass is for one person to step up and take the lead and coordinate with the other members to make sure each person completes their tasks by the due date. 

Again, every team, no matter how small or created for what purpose, needs a leader, whether appointed or not. 

In the case of our leadership program, I don’t appoint a leader. I provide the opportunity for the group to experience what happens when there is a lack of leadership (i.e. No Pass). 

This experiential learning, whilst at times it can feel unpleasant and awkward, provides much more value than me simply handing out notes and lecturing on the importance of leadership. 

This week I’d like you to look at the teams in your business and in your personal life. 

How many of them have an “appointed” leader? (In other words, positional leadership with a title and authority.) 

How many of them started as groups of individuals and someone stepped up to lead? 

Every team needs a leader. 

People are looking for leadership. 

Are you that person? Are you the one who will put your hand up, whether appointed or not and take charge? 

I challenge you to notice the difference in productivity and enjoyment of the tasks between groups and teams that have leaders and those that don’t. 

Let me know how you go.

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