If It Doesn’t Feel Good… (WT513)

If It Doesn’t Feel Good… (WT513)


WT513 If It Doesn’t Feel Good

Firstly, a big shout out to John Lizzio for correcting my reference to Steven Covey’s story about sharpening the saw in last week’s thought. “In Covey’s story of the two lumberjacks, one worked through. The other sharpened his saw for 10 minutes each hour. And cut more.” Thank you, John.  

This week I’d like to look at your feelings. Your feelings or our emotional guidance system can signal to us that our thinking is off.

Here’s an example. I recently provided some online training for clients. At the end of the training, I collapsed back in my seat and started to criticize myself.

“Oh, that was hopeless.”

“There was no connection.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“No-one is interested in learning this stuff.”

“They were only there because they had to be.”

On and on and on went my inner critic. As I listened to myself, I felt worse and worse. I was disappointed with myself, frustrated with myself and feeling hopeless.

I was in the primal state. The state of fight or flight where I’m not able to come up with creative solutions.

I did my best to move myself out of this state into the creative, joyful powerful state, but it didn’t work. My critic was having a field day. I decided to go for a walk to clear my head.

When I got back to the office, I was so surprised to see some text messages and emails showing me the graphic summary that one of the team members had created after the training. 

“Wow! They had gotten something out of the training. Wow! They did understand the message. Wow! They enjoyed it and were grateful.”

What a classic case study for what we teach. According to David Bayer, if it doesn’t feel good, it’s not true. This was certainly the case for me. It didn’t feel good and when I examined my thinking, and the positive feedback I received, I could see that what I was thinking was absolutely not true. I moved back into the powerful state.

With all that’s going on at the moment with COVID-19, please remember that if you’re not feeling good, whatever you are thinking is not true. Life is always working for you, even if it doesn’t feel like it in the moment. If you’re not feeling good, look to your thinking and look for the evidence of the opposite. If it doesn’t feel good, what you’re thinking is not true.

Keep Your Head Clean (WT490)

Keep Your Head Clean (WT490)


WT490 Keep Your Head Clean

I’m not talking about having a shower or washing your face when I say, “Keep Your Head Clean” but of course, knowing me, you know that.

Here’s an example to explain what I mean: Two people go for a promotion at work. Neither of them succeed. Max gets depressed and angry and full of negative self talk such as “I don’t know what I have to do to get ahead in this company. Why does this always happen to me? How come I never seem to get the promotion?” On the other hand, Wendy feels disappointed, however quickly shrugs it off and asks her supervisor, “What can I do to be promoted? What do you need to see in order for me to be recognised and promoted?”

Which of the two do you think has the best chance of being promoted in the future, Max or Wendy?

I trust you answered Wendy. Why?

It’s because Wendy kept her head clean. She stayed open to possibility and she asked empowering questions. 

Our brain is like a Google search engine. Its job is to find the answer to your questions, so it’s imperative that you ask empowering questions.

If you look at the questions Max asked, “Why does this always happen to me? How come I never seem to get a promotion?” It’s easy to see how his brain will come up with all sorts of reasons why it’s most likely not his fault; the supervisor doesn’t know what she’s doing, this company is hopeless, you have to suck up to the boss to get ahead; you can see where this line of thought will end up.

When you understand how the brain works and you understand that it is just another organ in the body, you can put it to work to find you the answers you need, to help you get what you want BUT you have to keep your head clean. You have to ask empowering questions. You have to notice when your thinking is off and correct it as soon as you notice it.

That is how you keep your head clean and create the life you want.

Pin It on Pinterest