This week’s theme is about “Independence”.

Years ago one of my bosses was telling me a story about his grandchildren.

He had three grandchildren – twins and an elder sister.

“The eldest is so independent. She will not accept help of any kind”, he said.

“When I offer her help (and she’s only 4 years old), she replies “My Can Do It”, he continued.

“The twins are completely different. Not only do they accept my help, they will often ask for it, “Grandpa, I need you to help me”, he added. (They were 3 years old at the time.)

I find this fascinating that right from the get-go, we are different in how we respond to accepting help.

This week I’ve been working with lots of clients who are similar to the elder sister.

“My can do it.”

Yes you can. And it’s ok to ask for and accept help. Afterall, aren’t the independent ones, the ones to be the first to offer help.

Imagine if we all said, “My can do it”. None of us would have the gift of being able to help.

Which of the grandkids are you most like?

If you’re like the eldest, could you please reframe your mindset and tone down your independence by asking for and accepting help?

We’re all in this life together.

It’s ok to put your hand up.

If you don’t put your hand up, consider yourself stingy.

What? Stingy?

Yes, stingy. Stingy because you are depriving others of the joy of helping or put another way, what if I said to you, “You can’t help anyone else until you accept help from another”. Would that encourage you to put your hand up.

This week, I encourage you to be open and honest with those who care about you. Putting your hand up and asking for or accepting help takes courage.

Be courageous and put your hand up.

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During the week one of my friends rang me out of the blue.

She lives in Queensland and it was lovely to hear from her.

She’s normally jetsetting around the globe running events, which have all been put on hold, of course, until we can travel again.

“Shirley, it’s the school holidays in a few weeks and we just need to get away, so I’m looking at hiring a motorhome”, she said.

“Wonderful! Where are you planning to go?”

“We want to go to Airlie Beach and up and down the coast. The thing is I’ve never done this before so I thought I would ask you for some advice. I don’t even know what to ask”, Sandra replied.

I’m not going to bore you with the details of the conversation and the questions she didn’t have or the advice we gave. That’s not the point of the thought.

The point is, I am always so impressed with Sandra’s openness to ask for help. She is a very smart woman and understands the power of having people in her network.

She doesn’t have any limiting beliefs about having to do it all herself. She doesn’t have any limiting beliefs about asking questions or what people might think of her when she does ask. She simply calls and asks.

How about you?

Do you understand the power of your network?

Are you open to asking for help, even when you don’t know what you don’t know?

More importantly, do you take the advice and act on it?

In fact, I had another conversation with a colleague today who also mentioned how supported she felt these past few weeks, as she realised the power of her network and the willingness of the people in her network to help her as she and her family navigated the purchase of a house in a different state to her home state.

When you’re doing something new or going somewhere you’ve never been before, it’s okay to ask for help and advice. This is something that Ross and I have learned over the past 18 months as we’ve travelled around.

We’d never driven or camped in a motorhome before. Heck, we left the tap fittings on the tap at the first caravan park we stayed at and didn’t realise until we got to Canberra and had no pipe fittings. Luckily for us, the chap in the van next to us had a spare and loaned us one until we purchased one and a spare the following day.

It’s okay to ask, even when you don’t know what to ask. Go ahead and ask anyway. You might be surprised at how much joy your network actually gets from helping you.

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